Central banks hate this one weird trick citizens are using to escape debt-slavery!
Clickbait is super annoying. It's annoying because somewhere along the lines of standing out from the crowd, a small group of people figured out specific meta-context that can be used to get more views for their content. Whether by design or accidental, these meta-strategies were then shared with the world to be copied by all.
I absolutely hate meta game-theory because it ruins the entire game for everyone. Hearthstone and Magic the Gathering used to be badass when you had to come up with your own ideas for decks; figuring out what works and what doesn't. But then at a certain point everyone just goes online and copies what the pros are doing and boom: the meta ruins the entire game because everyone is doing the same annoyingly overpowered strategies. We need some dynamic intervention that prevents this kind of copycat behavior. Easier said than done, I'm afraid. I have a lot of ideas, but forcing people to come up with their own strategy isn't one of them. Damn you, Internet!
Monkey see monkey do.
Bitcoin has to go up to this number in order to go up some more!
Within the 'metaverse' (ironically now an official replacement for 'cryptoverse') price speculation is obviously the most egregious clickbait out there. It is so damn easy to just bullshit your way through a post without actually saying anything, especially if the post is bullish and you're just telling people what they want to hear: "number go up". Even if the post is bearish that still gives the reader and opportunity to make money. You'll notice that no one EVER talks about the market going sideways. That serves nobody's purpose.
I'm going to scroll through my crypto news feed right now and just copy every clickbait title I see. Let's find out what happens, shall we?
- Is the Alt-Season Now Postponed to the first quarter of 2022?
- Cardano, XRP, Ethereum Classic Price Analysis.
- Despite 21% drawdown, Bitcoin holders might witness a bull market if...
- Grayscale Prepares to Sue SEC Over Spot Bitcoin ETF ([not clickbait just totally badass]).
- ZCash surges 7% after Digital Currency Group COE announces $85M purchase. ([my god 7%! That's 2% more than 5%!])
- A Bridge to Binance Takes $PUSSY to the Masses ([lol])
- NFT Gaming Platform Splinterlands Sells out First Chaos Legion Release ([say what?!])
- This is where Dogecoin Price is Heading This Snow Fall!
- Here are the 10 best performing cryptocurrencies in november.
- Ethereum Market Cap is less than 50% away from flipping BTC.
Take this quiz to see if you're a manipulative asshole!
Hey, if I'm being honest, the clickbait wasn't that bad today. We got a splinterlands post and the SEC is getting sued by Grayscale, which is hilarious. I guess you'll just have to take my word for it that it's usually even worse than what I just regurgitated here.
Top 5 reasons clickbait is really fucking annoying.
- The title is purposefully vague so you have to click the link in order to even know what it's talking about.
- The content of the message is pointless and only designed to exploit an emotional response and trigger a fleeting dopamine hit.
- The same patterns get used over and over again in classic "cookie cutter" form, making them extremely tedious and boring, but also addictive, which is even more annoying.
- The data market gets flooded with garbage, making it difficult to find information that actually matters.
- People who don't know any better start to believe that this kind of content is important.
Experts reveal why your dick is so small and how to fix the problem.
Wow I never knew how many testosterone supplements I had been missing out on! Thanks, Internet! But how we can manipulate these cookie-cutter brain-hacks to serve our own purposes?! Once again I asked Google, because Google knows everything.
5-effective-clickbait-tactics
List, Quiz, Nostalgia, Humor, and Advice.
Let's try "Nostalgia"
Remember Wayne's World? Well this new cryptocurrency in the making is absolutely 'Shwing'!
Nailed it.
Smash that like button and make sure to subscribe to my channel!
Not only does clickbait get people looking at our content more often than they normally would, but there are also other repetitive techniques used to get likes, followers, and subs. Usually it goes something like this: "Remember to like my content, peasant.", "I have to remind you to do these things because you'll forget otherwise". It's funny how well these tactics actually work. You'll see them on YouTube 90% of the time at the end of a video. Barf.
Welcome to the Big Dick Club.
But who cares about what I think? I want to know about what you think! Tell me in the comments! Make sure to like and subscribe to my channel.
Hail Satan.
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